Recently a new friend asked me what makes me happy.

I talked for a while, trying to get at the truth of it and landed on: caring for others. It felt authentic. But then I woke up this morning and there was something in my gut that wanted to answer that question again in a way that was more self-indulgent. Self-preservational. As I let myself dream my list, I realized that I’ve done very few of the things on it in the last nine months. I also realized that I had planned to do many of the things on my list in 2020 but haven’t been able to due to the pandemic. Furthermore, I realized that the things on my list that ARE things that I could be doing in a pandemic…I’m still not really doing.

Just because our lives have been dramatically changed in 2020, it does not mean that we aren’t allowed to be happy. Making this list allowed me the chance to dream about the future, reminded me of happy memories from the past, and showed me what is absolutely available to me in the realm of happiness if I give myself permission to say yes. I strongly encourage you to make your own list. It’s such a simple thing to do. And it showed me just how much of my happiness I’ve let Covid take away. I mean, just because I can’t gallop a horse in Morocco right now, doesn’t mean that I can’t put my guitar in my lap. And play. And sing. And…well…be happy.

Here’s my list. In no particular order:

Bumming around all day in a great walking city with no agenda. Like New York. London. Florence. San Francisco. Boston. Chicago. Seattle. Popping into indie bookstores, cafes, museums, galleries, pubs. Catching a matinee at an indie movie house. I had a day like that in NYC. March 1st. The day before my last book tour started. It was heaven. I was so happy.

Eating a very long very good dinner with very good wine outside with friends and/or family. Cooking most of it. Enjoying all of it.

Playing music and singing with people who don’t take it too seriously and who love it especially because of that.

Listening to jazz on a rainy day.

Reading on my screened porch in summer.

Walking on beaches. Picking up shells. And rocks. Especially heart shaped rocks.

Eating at a world class restaurant. For hours.

Foraging for mushrooms and huckleberries. Basically a bushwacked walk in the woods.

Hovering in an airplane over a new place that I’ve never been before and have planned to visit for a long time, about to land, taking it all in, feeling like I’m about to be so new.

Galloping horses. On beaches.

Walking in the mountains to a lake.

Cutting flowers from my garden and making arrangements with them and putting them around my house. Especially the ones just for me.

Taking baths.

A very nice boutique hotel.

Percale sheets.

Playing card games with my kids.

Sitting by any kind of river. Floating down a slow river.

Sitting in the amphitheater of a Greek or Roman ruin. Imagining what went on there in ancient times. Thinking about how much we haven’t changed.

Diving into a mountain lake in summer. And the feeling of my skin afterward.

Soaking in remote hot springs.

Outdoor music festivals. Dancing in a happy crowd.

Being in the audience in a grand performance hall, listening to a great work of classical music, or classical choral music.

Popping into an old church in Europe and listening to someone practicing the organ. 

Taking a ferry to an island where I’m going to spend some time, preferably writing.

Touring an artist’s home that has been made into a museum.

All day at a major art museum.

Writing.

Teaching writing.

Playing the piano.

Playing my guitar.

Family togetherness.

That’s a good start, anyway. Made me smile. And again…made me realize how little of this list I have lived in the last nine months… Now you try it! Let me know how it goes!

Here’s something that makes me REALLY happy! Ecstatic, even!

And it’s happening very soon!

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